ZAP!

Please forgive us.

Our computer was struck by lightening.

We have just received our first Mac and our learning feverishly so that we can return to blog land.

After all, it's summer, Celia turned one, and so much more is going on.

soon...

4th Generation

We decided we wanted to take a trip together every year. A 3 Generations Trip we'd call it! My mom, me, and Celia.

Well, this year, my mom invited Celia and I to accompany her on a trip to Nauvoo, IL. She had promised my grandpa, Cecil, that she would take him there one last time. Him being 92 this year, well... you just never know. I've always dreamed of having my children in the presence of a 4th generation. Now, Cecil is no Nellie, but I said yes anyway.

I could write a short story about this trip, but I have not the time for such a wacky writing right now, I'll just leave it at that.

Off we went! Celia did pretty good on the drive seeing as we made a play space for her when the carseat got to be a bore. I know, naughty me! But this is the way I traveled when I was little and I made it just fine, so when traffic was clear and the road was straight, Celia got to play! Seeing as we ended up in the car for 11 hours that first day (LOOOng story!) this was a blessing!!



We rented a cottage so that a rickity 92 year old, a busy 65 year old, an exhausted 31 year old and a whimsical 10 month old could have some semblence of normalacy. HA! So much for that! You don't put 4 generations in a house for 4 days together and not have adventure!



All in all we had a fun trip! Although I am not a member of the church that my family is, the town of Nauvoo is of great interest to someone like me. Here's Celia in front of one of the Mormon temples.



It's a whole town that is based on how it was back in the late 1800's as a Mormon village. They have demonstrations of baking bread,



making bricks, using a loom, making barrels, making quilts, and even a drug stored that had a herb garden for all their healing



and on and on and on! A future homesteader's wet dream! Not to mention one room cabins. Can you see the Vollers now?!



Seeing as Celia is not letting me type, I'll leave it there. Here are some vidoes I took in the cottage:

Telling some stories:


And here Celia is: She found the joy of her own baby:

Old Videos

Here are some videos from May we meant to post. To us, they're so funny we decided to post them anyway.

May we present: Celia Dancing to Barenaked Ladies

The Vollers Turn 4

HAPPY 4TH ANNIVERSARY, VOLLERS!

Yes, on the 22nd of May, we are happy to say, we have been in wedded bliss for 4 whole years! (did that sound Dr. Suess-ish?) HA! It's funny to think of what a really short time that is in the grand journey that is marriage, but we figure it's best to count every one with festive, banging, steel drums.

2003


In the spirit of my cousins, Sunny, Holly and Nikki, I am going to do a "What I Love" entry about the Voller Marriage. It seems appropriate to pick the.... drum roll, please...

TOP 4 REASONS THE VOLLER MARRIAGE IS THE BOMB.

2004


1. Communication. Yes, I know, all us couples "communicate." Where's my keys? Will you buy me this cereal next grocery stop? What did I do wrong this time? :) But I'm grateful for the fact that Steve and I have great TALKS! Our first date at Bistro Bella Vita, we touched on religion, God, and politics all in an hour dinner conversation and it hasn't stopped yet. Steve still looks at me sometimes and says, "I've been thinking about Goethe-ian Science." Or I grab him and say, "I was thinking about Obama vs. McCain or Hillary vs. McCain." This is my favorite thing about us.

2005


2. Laughter. Steve and I bicker just like everyone else. Lately, it seems like it's more often than before as stessful situaitons take their toll. But in the end I don't laugh as hard with anyone as I do with Steve. Sometimes his humor makes me shake my head in disapproval (him passing gas extra loud because Celia likes to copy the sound he makes -- ummm.. yeah.) But in the end, I think he's funny.

2006


3. Belief. I don't think I could have managed marriage with anyone that wasn't as passionate about their beliefs as I am. (it helps that they are the SAME beliefs :) ) We love learning about food and the farm and the science of our bodies. We are very into the environment and the effects of our choices on Celia's children. We are very passionate about attachment parenting. We are great believers of the outdoors and it's ability to heal, give peace, and excite any day. I love this about Steve.

2007


4. In Your Face Honesty. Sometimes, this doesn't go as planned. My temper sometimes gets a leg up from the brain part of me that WOULD have said, "Umm.. think a minute, this is silly." But all in all, our ability to tell each other ALL -- and I mean ALL -- has given us not only such an open relationship, but it is so freeing to know that we can totally be ourselves and tell each other anything, and the next morning, we're still married, and we still think the other is pretty cool. (sometimes it takes J about that, 24 hours, to cool off)

2008



This year we celebrated our anniversary going on the Leelanau Wine Trail here in Michigan. For the NON-Michiganders, hold up your left hand and the top of your pinky would be Leelanau. And it is GEORGEOUS people! Again, Michigan is a hidden gem. Here is a photo montage of our GREAT FUN!

And Celia did GREAT! 2 days with Grandma Char turned out to be just fine (although she took NO MILK but a few drinks the whole time -- she'd take water from the glass, but no milk -- smarty! Grandma Char stocked her up on lots of food and extra yogurt)And on Sunday we were both up at 6am and excited to get home to our girl we missed SO MUCH!

The View from our room at the Vineyard Inn!



Michigan is SOOO pretty! This is the view from Leelanau Cellars, our first stop.



And get this! The people on our wine tour -- from 14 Mile RD IN ROCKFORD! We just met these people, had no idea who our tour mates were when we booked this! Then, we get to the first winery and the wine pourer, Kathy, used to be a teacher at the VERY school that one of our tour mates is a custodian at here in Rockford! AND THEN, in walks someone I recognize! Low and behold it is a Dr. VanOtteren that I use to work with in Critical Care here in Grand Rapids!! Uncanny! Dr. Glenn even bought us an anniversary gift!


Here we are at Willow Vineyards! It's for SALE PEOPLE! Anyone have 2.2 Million the Vollers could borrow!?


This used to be a chicken coop! Shady Lane Cellars transformed it into a tasting station! Pretty posh place for a chicken.



And Look How Beauiful the vineyards are! You don't have to drink wine to just sit back and enjoy such lovliness!




All in all we visited 7 wineries! We could have visited 7 new ones the next day but had to get home! AHHH!! Next time! :)

Words and Signs and Funnys

Yes, we admit it. We've been so self absorbed in our house situation we have been incomplete in reporting all the goodness around. A good lesson.

Upon reading past blogs to see what we have told you all out there in our cyber family, we realized that we did not tell you so MUCH!

A biggy! Celia's first word! It all started when we were both ill about a month ago when Celia was almost 9 months. We were in Blockbuster and a young teen couple were in the same isle. The girl was quite interested in Celia and Celia stared back at her. Now Celia's been waving for quite some time, but all of a sudden she waved and then said, "Eye." What did you say? Did she say, hi, I wondered? I was sure I was mistaken.

Next stop, groceries. Celia, normally shy and reserved, started the trip out with a band by telling everyone "Eye" with a wave in the store! It was sooo funny!! Now, she's so proficient she actually says "Hi" with the "H" sound, and sometimes adds, "Hi dada!" (Like she did in the middle of the night when Steve went in to comfort her and put her back down.) Here's my attempt at a video: They never perform on cue do they? :)



Also, I have been signing to Celia since she was very little. Just easy words. At 8 months she started to do the "milk" sign whenever she wanted to breastfeed! It was so exciting to us!! So we started adding more words. Still, she just signed "milk." Ah well, we figured. This week, all of a sudden, it's like a light went on for her. I tell her "I love you" all the time in sign language and the other morning in bed she clasped her hands in front of her heart and swayed back and forth like I do when I say it and gave a high pitch "ahhhh." Here's my attempt at a video which didn't really catch it. Oh, and no there was no attempt to make myself presentable at 7am in this video:




She also started doing the "more" sign while eating. It's more like clapping, but same thing, right!? AND awhile back I figured a sign for her to show me she was done eating and I've been doing it after each meal once she slows down, and just yesterday, there it was!! "All Done." (a swipe of her hand above and across her tray) Speaking of food, this kid is so funny! She eats EVERYTHING!! Her favorites are humus (???!!!), cottage cheese and kiwi! She ate ethiopian food the other night!

Anyway, we are having SO much fun these days! We are out in the garden everyday, she's big enough to get in the backpack now for walks, she's graduated from crawling to pulling herself up on things. This is funny. I wondered why she wasn't interested in this earlier. Well, upon watching her, I realized she's too short to pull herself up to what normal babies would: the couch, the coffee table etc... So once we figured that out, she started to pull herself up to the bottom step and the stereo on the floor of her room! Yep, height challenges she will clearly face forever as a Voller. :)

Steve and I are going away for our 4th anniversary this weekend. We are going on the wine tours of Leelanau Peninsula here in Michigan and staying in an Inn on Suttons Bay! We are so excited and so in need of some time away. We are both (especially mom) nervous about leaving Celia for 2 days. We will miss her soooo much! I know, it's crazy, but it's true. Lastly, the garden is going well! Our peas and potatoes and going up like rockets and our spinach and spring greens are TRYING to make it. Some pesky bug keeps eating them in their infancy! This is the first year our beets and carrots aren't making an appereance.... hmmmm... We got rhubarb plants from our neighbor and Great Grandpa Roth and Grandpa Larry came over to help us expand our garden by 3 times!! Now it's remove all the clumps fast enough time to get in the corn and beans and cucs this week! love to you all. We know we have been distant, but we are finally in the clear with much stress and self involvement. what a relief.

ahhhh, Spring!

Our March-May - PHOTO STYLE!

We had a warm spell early April and Celia was teething. Easy. Blanket outside with frozen blueberries makes both ladies happy!





Grandma Char came over late April and we mulched the flowerbeds while Celia played in her fun tent.



Last week Celia had her first swing experience -- loved it! -- with friend, Sevi Cullum. Only 7 weeks apart you can see how tiny Celia is (in the 10th percentile says the Dr.) Are you at all surprised?



We met Uncle Andy and cousin Riley for a brisk late March walk as well.



Then for Easter in March, I got to play with cousin, Breanna



Have Grandma Judy read to me:



Get lovin' from Grandma Carol:



And of course, be with us, the 'rents and the pup outdoors.

Crawling, Teething, and Sniffling, OH MY!

April has been QUITE THE MONTH for all in the Voller Family.

First Celia:

Her first cold graced us with its appearance this month. She had a raspy gurgling cough and a stuffed/runny nose for 7 days. We were actually quite pleased with this seeing as our dr. told us that this cold is lasting 14 days in children.

She was up all times of the night. She was miserable all day. Steve and I took turns sleeping with her, bringing the futon into her bedroom to slumber. Her nose sucker got lots of action. We went through 6 kleenex boxes (did we mention Steve was sick with a cold PRIOR to Celia and then J got the cold WITH Celia, and then Steve proceeded to get another cold AFTER Celia and J? Can you say stress got the better of us?)

So she finally gets better -- starts to smile -- becomes more Celia-esque... and then one day was so FUSSY J thought she was going to jump out the window. Or off the roof. Or just run away.

Next day --there they were. 2 teeth poking through -- her top two incisors! So that little fuss budget had her reasons. I quickly chastised myself for getting upset and made a committment to be a better parent next time.

THEN low and behold -- she's getting mad again. ARE YOU KIDDING ME??!! WHAT NOW??!!! Next day -- she's crawling. Here's Steve's video. Funny. Celia doesn't drink from a bottle. It's boob or cup. But we're going away for our anniversary for 2 days and Celia will need to have breastmilk from a bottle. As you see, she was just fine with this! WHEW!!! Watch this:



I tell myself again that our baby is so mellow, I KNOW that when she's fussy something's wrong. Next time, I will understand this. Next time I'll be a better parent.

We have a blast for a week. Celia's new mobility is freeing for us both. The sun ironically shows it's face, decides to warm our Michigan soil and we venture out every day for walks, grass pulling and accidential sunburns.



And then, it happens. Celia is crying ALL DAY. Crying, screaming, fussing, crying, whining, fussing. 8 days. All Day. My nerves were like downed electric wires sparking and fizzing in the night rain. My head was ringing. My back was knotted up and would lock and ache the second I heard her voice. I was MAD. She was CLEAN, FED, RESTED, HELD, LOVED.... WHAT WHAT WHAT?!?!?!?!?! "I can't do this," I said to Steve. "I'm leaving for a few days. I'm losing it!" Cry, Cry, Cry. No matter what I did. I actually threw things. I actually yelled. I actually felt like a robot on speed.

This morning -- look at that! Her top two middle teeth. And she's fine.

And so I say again... oh! NO!! Next time, Next time, I PROMISE Celia, I'll be the better parent. I'm So sorry!

And then I realize, this is what being a good parent is. You go through very hard times. You may not take the moment to have the higher attitude, but you TRY. You may feel like your head is going to roll off in search of peace leaving your body to still totter along with a laundry basket on the hip, a pan in one hand, a garden trowel in the other, and the vacumm cord wrapped around your ankle. But you make it. You keep in the game. You pray daily for it all to end. And of course it does. You still feed, love, change, rock, sing and dance with your child. You still play with them. You still kiss them. You make it. Good parent.

As for Steve and myself, well, you can imagine what we felt like during this, both getting our spring detox groove on as well. And the fat, dripping, sour red cherry on top -- the mortgage issue. We thought surely this would be cleared up. Somehow. Someway. But it just dragged on and on and on. Our friend Killian worked his tail off to help us. Worked overtime to get us the best we could get. And in the end, it all fell through. Just last night.

Details are long and tedious. Stories are detailed and depressing. But yet we feel oddly relieved. We're out of money. We're going to sell our home, and possibly lose it to foreclosure in the process if it doesn't sell quickly or I don't get a night job. (Even through it all I will not give up my day job as Celia's mom. That is solid, in stone, sacred, we both have committed to this)

The savings are gone and the retirement is gone. This will be the first month since Oct 2006 that this all began we'll have to say we can't make our payment. And it's a relief. We did our best. We fought a good hard fight. But we looked in the mirror. Our lips were bulging and swollen, blood ran off of a gash in the cheek, our left eye had a huge black circle adorning it, our nose was off to the right. It's time to stop, we said. It's time to stop. Ding, Ding, Ding. The bell has tolled. We step out of the ring. Collapse in a chair. It will take us years to fix the damage that has occured in just a year and a half. But you start over.

We are grateful that this was so aggrivating that it knocked us into the finite knowledge of having ultimate control over our finances. We were never going to be in debt to anyone again. Not even a mortgage company. We may get a small loan for land, but then we're going to build as the money comes in. We'll rent to get our savings back. We'll start over on the 401K. It's just a circle, this life. And here we are, at the beginning. Feels good. odd.





OH! And we went to see the Dalai Lama in Ann Arbor! It was wonderful to be in his presence and hear his words. There's much to be said about this, but we've talked long enough. Here's our top three moments: The Dalai Lama ( no cameras allowed, so here's the news from that day) Eating at Zingermans. The Arb. (Celia chilling in the Arb -- Steve's bliss :) )

Celia Videos

Mama and Other Fun

Can you smell it in the air? The smell of snow is being replaced with none other than the smell of soil. Wet, cold soil as it warms... The smell of SPRING!! And what did spring bring to the Vollers? Celia seems to have officially attached her first word to something...

ME!

I hear many babies say "dada" first, but our lady now mumbles "mama" or "mummum" when she wants me or wants to nurse. Lucky me! Now whenever I hear that little voice call out "mamamamamam," I'm an absolute sucker. I stop whatever is going on and run over like a child that hears the ice cream truck on a July afternoon. She just talks talks talks! It's hilarious! And although she seems to run wild verbally these days, phyisically, well, she really wants to crawl, but not enough to bother too much. Standing -- well, that's just not any sort of fun, says Celia. Here's a video of her babbling away!



She has also taken to clapping her hands this week and waving! She has been copying us for a few weeks, but this is especially fun! Check out video 2 of copying daddy smacking his mouth.



Celia had her first illness this month too. Luckily, it wasn't so bad. She started to not keep down solids for a day and then I noticed a small temp. (and yes, took my first journey into rectalville -- woo hoo...) What did I do? The only thing that made her happy: Kept her close, went to liquids only and laid around with her all day. Her she is, too big to really be in the sling this way, but right where she wanted.



We are also happy to report that in general we are getting 6ish hours of sleep in a row!! This is HUGE!! I look back to January and the 6 months of intense sleeplessness and I don't know how we made it. But you do, right? You've seen Celia playing guitar with Steve... well, clearly I caught another special moment between dad and daughter. Celia is always in smiles when dad is around. They are quite the pair!



She eats like a little piggy too, loving her mama made food. Although it looks as if she may be ready for some finger foods, would you say?



On the Steve and Jeannie front, we have started our first indoor seeds for our expanded garden to get back to our local eating goal. We are excited to hop back on the locavore train, toot toot. It's been a bit of a bother to me to buy greens and tomatoes, but next year at this time I hope to be using up the last can of tomatoes from the garden, the last onion from storage, the last frozen peas bag. YIPPIE!

Jeannie has spent most of her time with the garden endeavor while caring for little Celia. Steve has been really enjoying his new job and he is BUSY BUSY BUSY! Every day we thank the Foremost gods for giving Steve this promotion! Now I get to stay home with babe and he gets to be happy. I'd say two invaluable aspects of life, yes?

We've had our share of trials as well. Our mortgage situation has hit the fan, as they say. Deep up to our gullets in payments for the adjustable mortgage, we have been close to drowning in the preditory lending scandals we are all hearing so much about. Yet, hazaa, we are now out of our "penalty period" to get a new mortgage and can do so without forking over cash up our wazoo to do so. Relief! But wait... everything was in the works. We were finally able to breathe. This month all savings has been depleted, the 401K cashed out to pay for our mortgage and medical bills for the birth is gone. Just in time...

Except... House value down 10,000? What? 100% loan to value ratio? No banks will refinance those 100%-er's? Explitives erupt.

This is our current head mess. Steve and I try daily to grab a broom and sweep away the fudge of confusion to see clearly as to the right path. We send out for help and guidence. We sit in silence for the magic voice of reason to speak. We smack a few bats that are making homes in our brains, only to come out at night and flutter us awake in panic... Soon, is all we can say... soon.

We are thinking of finding some people that have land or know someone that has land and seeing if they want to sell, rent or make a trade with us. We'd like to build a sustainable one room cabin with loft for around 4,000. We can grow food or cook and clean or mow lawns or shovel snow in turn for a space to practice building skills and try out a rain water shower in the cabin (rain water caught by barrel, heated with solar, and pumped into a small shower... in turn this water would be "gray water" and could be used for the garden, or even pumped back in for toilet water... I digress) as well as try to get out of debt and get our savings back and running. When done, we'll take the cabin with us, or you can buy it for a guest house. Sound fun?

We don't know what will happen here, but we are glad to be together, glad to be warm on frosty spring mornings, glad to open a fridge and have food. I think this face says it all:

Celia Slide Show!

Come see little Celia in her 6th and 7th months!

Here's a link to her slide show :)


http://www.kodakgallery.com/I.jsp?c=v8vu267.tcik3cv&x=0&y=puuxil


More time to come with updates and stories GALORE!

The Voller Look A Like Meter

MyHeritage: Look-alike Meter - Free family history - Genealogical research

The Skinny

We meant to write! Really we have! I actually had a wicked long, kick ass blog all ready to post, but well, January brought some adventures other than the local eating onion. So, we thought we’d give you the skinny as to where we have been during this month.

A. Celia cut two teeth at the same time. Parents, you know how that goes. Soon after, she began to go to town on my knuckles and started rubbing her tongue across her UPPER teeth! Ah me! Poor little lady.

B. For the second time in our 6 year relationship, Steve came down with a fever. And this was bad. His temperature was over 102 degrees for 4 days. So clearly he was off all baby duty. No holding, rocking, getting up in the night, comforting, putting down to sleep or nap, no nada. And yes this happened while Celia was teething. Can you see my eyes starting to twitch, my head beginning to tick?

C. During this my insomnia troubles finally got the best of me. Getting 4 hours of sleep on average every night for 6 months eventually will cause someone to crack we discovered.

Celia sleeps fairly well. She does still wake up, but goes right back down. I on the other hand wake and then become crack mommy. I cannot sleep again – even during the day. I run around like some coked up rock star minus the red leather pants (although if I had a pair, I’d probably put them on). We’ve known for a time that there was some chemical imbalance here, but we have high deductible insurance, and we thought maybe it would work itself out. Ummmm… no.

I started crying uncontrollably multiple times within that week period. I’m not exactly a crier… Well, I guess I really cry, well, never. So this was alarming to Steve. I would collapse blubbering away in deep sobs and then zone out in a mummy like state feeling kinda numb, kinda drugged. I started to run loose emotionally. Yelling, becoming irrational, losing my temper with a poor teething baby. Details are unnecessary; it was just bad.

And yes, during all this, I still cooked seasonally and from scratch. It was at this point that I started to think I might be nuts.
One day when I was peeling a squash (a very tedious task) and man handling a rutabaga, I looked up out the window and had one of those Wonder Years moments. The Byrds “Turn, Turn, Turn” plays in the background and the light gets soft around my face and a voice speaks saying, “Little did I know that the next winter, having prepared for this type of eating, we’d be in much better shape than now.” After all, I can quickly grab a bag of frozen beans, walk downstairs and get me some canned tomatoes, chuck me some dried peaches, I need a snack.

Another interesting twist of events was when I finally went to the doctor and found out that I am under the weight I was BEFORE I got pregnant. Whoopsie.
It was then that we realized things needed to change. I require an extra 700 calories a day to be a breastfeeding mama and clearly something went astray. To be Celia’s source of nutrition is an absolute gift in my eyes, and this lack of greens and fresh fruit is frankly unacceptable. Those things missing in my diet are then missing in Celia’s and well… no brainer, yes?

So, we have decided to forgo our adventure until the spring buds appear. I still plan on cooking seasonally for the most part, but we’ll just add sautéed spinach or throw a salad on the side.

Never fear, readers, the time is coming. I saw hot house rhubarb the other day at the store… spring will be here soon.

6 Month Celia

Celia has officially passed her first 1/2 year of life! And just two days after her 6 month milestone, she cut 2 teeth at the same time! Happy Birthday, little one! She's handling the pain pretty well. She's been enjoying frozen washcloths, her wooden toys and the foot of a toy giraffe to help her gnaw through the newness. Along with teeth, Celia has been sitting up on her own for over a month now! Her favorite past time again are those wooden blocks! Loves it! She has also found a new joy: the doorway bouncer. Seriously, she thinks this is the best fun created. Just watch:



Much to Mom and Dad's dismay, we still can not report very good night sleep. UG! She is eating every 4 hrs, sometimes 3, and we are in the process of figuring out if she actually IS hungry or just needs some cuddling. Needless to say, we are very tired and are looking towards the horizon for some much needed reprieve. We can not explain, although most of you parents know, how brillant it is to watch her expand and grow and take in this thing we called life. She's so aware and curious and absolutely sparkles when newness comes. Ah, if only we all could be like a 6 month old.